Dijonnaised and confused.

Posted in by CIVIL CIVIC | Edit
When the tour is over, and the weeks turn into months and the seasons change, as I sit in my bathtub picking chunks of black grit out of my bellybutton and drinking badly made mai-tai's, I am sometimes seized by bone-rattling attacks of the dreaded Blogguilt, which I will illustrate with this photograph of a despair-themed sandwich.


Bloguilt is a terrible nervous complex, suffered by giddy dilettantes and foppish fly-by-nighters who play-act the demanding role of blogger, but who have no stomach for the terrors and rigors of serious bloggery. 

We are a spineless breed, posting at whim, with no personal deadlines or discipline, or even adult literacy. But the blogosphere is a cruel mistress, and dabbling dandies like me and my sniveling kind will never command an audience or get a book deal or be asked to speak at black-tie events. 

A member of the hard-core blogging elite posting a scathing review of his own overcoat while waiting to be driven to a book-signing.

The real bloggers, the warrior class, will grind us to putty beneath their mountainous output and children will cheer and history will survey our bloody wreckage and say that justice was done. 

Death to the amatuers!! Hang them by their thumbs from the telephone poles!! Sell them to North Korea as cheap fertiliser!!!

So with that clear in mind I present my latest blogtasticated postable item entry! Only 3 months late!

There was this one time, back in the poisoned shit-mists of 2011, when me and my whacky traveling buddy, Baaron Von Cuddles III, happened to arrive in the storied city of Dijon, capital of the great Duchy of Burgundy.


When most people think of Dijon, they think of Olympic BMX gold-medalist and ultra-dominant downhill mountain-bike racer Anne-Caroline Chausson.

She has kicked so much ass for so long she doesn't even feel it anymore!


Serious, gold-medal radness. 

But would you believe it is also home to some nice old buildings and a namesake mustard? True story!

Anyway, the day was cold and bright when our Global Positioning Thingy guided us to a charming, leafy little park situated on the banks of a canal on the outskirts of town. There were plenty of smiling elderly dog-walkers and young mothers pushing their screaming maggots around in strollers, but very little sign of anything that looked like a "rock-venue". We checked and rechecked the day-sheet and made a thorough recon of the park, but it seemed we had been given a "bum steer".

"Fucking Almond!!!" screamed the Baaron (refering to Almond "Chouchou" Tippex, our agent at the Julie Tippex Entertainment Megacorp). 
"She is going to pay a blood price that will cripple her arse for good!!!"

He whipped out his phone and was gearing up for a real frenzy of tele-communicated hate when I noticed this.....


Yes, a big red boat anchored on the canal had the word "spectacles" written on the side of it in freindly white lettering. My huge brain swiftly reasoned that this was a boat that put on spectacles! And is not the experience of a live in-person Civil Civic musical live concert nothing short of spectacular? 


Coincidence? The fuck it is!!

Take a long hard look at the mutherfuckin' boat venue.

Yep, we'd once again been bamboozled by the old "venue-on-a-boat" scam. The Baaron was crestfallen that he didn't get to "rip that little blonde scumbag a new one", but the sun was shining and butterflies were playing on the breeze, so he just set fire to a garbage bin and sulked for a few minutes and left it at that.

Rare snap of BVCIII working through his complex emotional landscape (visualised as a river of hate winding it's way through Rage Valley).

When it came time to unload the car we noticed that there was some sort of big, fuzzy ball stuffed in between The Box and our merch suitcase on the back-seat. It was slightly damp and heavy as mother-fuck, but we managed to wrestle it out of the car and put it on the ground. Well, once we got all the creases out and stood it upright it turned out to be nothing less than Almond, our booking agent! 

Chouchou likes do-nuts with sprinkles, horsies and other "supaire coool" stuff.

She'd been in there for three days, living off half-eaten Snickers bars and warm beer. That sneaky little scamp! So we rubbed most of the creases out of her and shot her full of Reductil and the circulation returned to her extremities quite quickly.


The boat/club was almost exactly the same size and layout as Le Sonic in Lyon, a filthy noise-barge that we have had the pleasure of boarding twice. But this one was much cleaner, fresher smelling and better appointed, which made me instantly suspicious. Clean venues make me nervous and I instinctively distrust the people who run them.

Post sound-check entertainment was provided by a group of belligerent stoners in card-board armor beating each-other with padded clubs. 


video

When the time came for loud shit to happen, the boat was well attended, with a large crowd of cute, happy teenagers coming out to see the local boys "Fallin Ditch" bust out their chipper vibes, and an equally large crowd of sad, confused twenty-eight year olds with cheap sneakers and bad dandruff turning up to see us. 


We amped up and delivered our noise with customary zeal and gusto, but I was vaguely disappointed with the crowd reaction, which seemed a little muted. 

I grumbled to the Baaron about "Dijon pussies" and "Too cool for schoolers" until he pointed out that it was only, like, seven o'clock in the evening and not even the most degenerate members of the audience were pathetically drunk yet. 


So I quickly reassessed the whole gig and was well satisfied. Apologies to the attendant Dijoners for jumping to conclusions, my bad.

So anyway, having made our ongodly racket and packed our crap back into the car, the night was still in it's youth, so we repaired to the home of Chantal, a notorious local rabble-rouser and no-goodnick, to hang loose with a select group of Dijon's young cultural elite.


Chantal, pictured exercising her right to free assembly as well as her right to put a sticker saying "Mega-Phone" on the side of a megaphone. A+.

They had booze and snacks and the latest indie sounds on the hi-fi system, so the hours passed swiftly.

On the whole, the experience served to reinforce my conviction that the French are indeed a grand people and should be allowed to yell into megaphones and beat each-other with padded clubs whenever they get the urge. 


Many thanks to our gracious hosts, association Sabotage and Novosonic.

26 Comments


  1. Anonymous

    I am really loving the theme/design of your website.
    Do you ever run into any web browser compatibility problems?

    A couple of my blog visitors have complained about my website not operating correctly in Explorer but
    looks great in Opera. Do you have any recommendations to help fix this issue?


    Feel free to visit my blog: concrete driveways

    February 20, 2013 at 4:57 AM

  2. Anonymous

    I'm new to building websites and I was wanting to know if having your site title relevant to your articles and other content really that crucial? I see your title, "Blogger: CIVIL CIVIC " does appear to be spot on with what your website is about but yet, I prefer to keep my title less content descriptive and based more around site branding. Would you think this is a good idea or bad idea? Any kind of assistance would be greatly valued.

    Here is my web site ... hardback

    February 20, 2013 at 8:13 AM

  3. Anonymous

    Heya! This is the third time visiting now and
    I just wanted to say I truley enjoy looking through your weblog.
    I've decided to bookmark it at delicious.com with the title: Blogger: CIVIL CIVIC and your Website address: http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=2598579618328098464&postID=6062118814918378468. I hope this is all right with you, I'm
    attempting to give your excellent blog a bit more publicity.
    Be back shortly.

    Also visit my website: Weeknight Bicycle

    February 20, 2013 at 9:42 AM

  4. Anonymous

    Howdy! Would you mind if I share your blog with my myspace group?
    There's a lot of folks that I think would really appreciate your content. Please let me know. Thank you

    Also visit my weblog; removal prices

    February 22, 2013 at 5:43 PM

  5. Anonymous

    My programmer is trying to persuade me to move to .net from
    PHP. I have always disliked the idea because of the expenses.
    But he's tryiong none the less. I've been
    using Movable-type on a variety of websites for about a year and am
    nervous about switching to another platform. I have heard very good things about blogengine.
    net. Is there a way I can import all my wordpress content into it?

    Any help would be greatly appreciated!

    my website ... pvc

    February 22, 2013 at 8:50 PM

  6. Anonymous

    Greetings! I've been reading your web site for a long time now and finally got the bravery to go ahead and give you a shout out from Humble Texas! Just wanted to tell you keep up the good job!

    Here is my site ... tree Stump
    Also see my web site :: stump rotting

    February 22, 2013 at 9:33 PM

  7. Anonymous

    Woah! I'm really enjoying the template/theme of this website. It's simple,
    yet effective. A lot of times it's challenging to get that "perfect balance" between usability and visual appeal. I must say that you've done a superb job with this.
    Also, the blog loads very quick for me on Firefox.

    Exceptional Blog!

    Also visit my blog - folije

    February 22, 2013 at 11:55 PM

  8. Anonymous

    Heya superb blog! Does running a blog such as this take a massive amount work?
    I have no knowledge of coding however I had been hoping to
    start my own blog soon. Anyways, if you have any
    suggestions or techniques for new blog owners please share.
    I know this is off topic however I just wanted to ask. Thank you!


    Feel free to surf to my web site pakovanje

    February 23, 2013 at 6:02 AM

  9. Anonymous

    We stumbled over here different website and thought I might check things out.
    I like what I see so now i'm following you. Look forward to looking into your web page yet again.

    my website - service

    February 23, 2013 at 8:39 AM

  10. Anonymous

    Greetings! I've been following your site for a long time now and finally got the bravery to go ahead and give you a shout out from Humble Tx! Just wanted to mention keep up the great work!

    March 7, 2013 at 10:23 AM

  11. Anonymous

    You made some good points there. I looked on the net for additional information about
    the issue and found most people will go along with your views on this
    site.

    Stop by my page; hcg weightloss

    April 9, 2013 at 5:14 PM

  12. Anonymous

    These exercises are nonetheless significantly less helpful as
    opposed to compound bowflex exercises.

    my page :: adjustable dumbbell set

    April 24, 2013 at 9:18 PM

  13. Anonymous

    In any case, it truly is most probably only your legs which you will likely be
    needing that level of weight resistance for.

    Also visit my blog; bowflex selecttech 552 adjustable dumbbells

    April 27, 2013 at 12:17 PM

  14. Anonymous

    Bit by bit lift your ideal leg to the side, trying to keep your toes,
    ankle, knee, and hip aligned.

    My web blog :: bowflex dumbbells 552

    April 30, 2013 at 12:48 PM

  15. Anonymous

    All people fall into a single category or maybe a combination of them.



    My webpage http://www.getfitnstrong.com/adjustable-dumbbells/7-reasons-adjustable-dumbbell-set/

    May 12, 2013 at 3:58 AM

  16. Anonymous

    Drink plenty of water and ensure to eat your fats, fiber, veggies
    and fruits, specifically avocados.

    Check out my homepage :: dumbbell clean

    May 17, 2013 at 9:15 AM

  17. Anonymous

    Ηеllo to evеry one, the contеntѕ present at this ωeb page аrе really awesome foг people
    knοwleԁge, wеll, keеp uρ the gοod worκ felloωs.


    Hаѵе a loоk at mу weblog ...

    diamondlinks review

    May 22, 2013 at 9:38 PM

  18. Anonymous

    Due to the fact our instruments are made of wooden, they're vulnerable to warping because of towards the characteristics on the wooden.

    Feel free to surf to my blog post: Report abuse

    May 24, 2013 at 4:13 AM

  19. Anonymous

    Good day! This is kind of off topic but I need some guidance from an established blog.
    Is it very hard to set up your own blog? I'm not very techincal but I can figure things out pretty quick. I'm thinking about setting up my own but I'm not sure where to begin. Do you have any points or suggestions? Thanks

    Feel free to surf to my website: advokati u zenici

    May 28, 2013 at 2:44 PM

  20. Anonymous

    It's a pity you don't have a donate button!

    I'd without a doubt donate to this fantastic blog! I guess for now i'll
    settle for book-marking and adding your RSS feed to my Google account.
    I look forward to fresh updates and will share this site with my Facebook group.
    Chat soon!

    Also visit my blog post: options

    May 29, 2013 at 12:22 PM

  21. Anonymous

    Good day! Do you know if they make any plugins to assist with SEO?
    I'm trying to get my blog to rank for some targeted keywords but I'm not seeing
    very good results. If you know of any please share. Cheers!


    my weblog; luggage bomb prank

    May 31, 2013 at 9:58 PM

  22. Anonymous

    Ensure that your entire body is entirely straight and stretched out.


    My site - dumbbells for sale

    June 6, 2013 at 6:03 PM

  23. Anonymous

    Where this cardio arrives from need to be diverse, so running exterior or biking are fantastic ideas, but when the weather turns bad, it really is nice to possess
    the options in the household.

    Look into my site: FB

    June 6, 2013 at 7:39 PM

  24. Anonymous

    When these cellulite exercises are essentially employed alongside normal hormone
    balancing likewise as the all way too crucial cleansing, cellulite work outs can in fact cut down too as at some point do away with the unpleasant overall look of
    cellulite inside your system.

    Feel free to surf to my website :: visit the following post

    June 8, 2013 at 5:26 AM

  25. Anonymous

    The energy together with velocity is improved greatly.



    Here is my web page ... http://www.getfitnstrong.com/bowflex-dumbbells/bowflex-selecttech-dumbbells-ultimate-home-exercising/

    June 13, 2013 at 3:47 AM

  26. Anonymous

    Second, when no cost weights permit you to manage the
    resistance angle and assortment of movement all through a specified
    work out, equipment present no this kind of independence of movement.


    Look into my web page ... bowflex hand weights

    June 13, 2013 at 5:23 AM

Leave a Comment